Crazy

I feel so confused lately.  Tonight has been a bit rough.  I’m sad about what is happening, I think, but I’m also really confused and hurt by my family.  I’m really in bad shape.  I can pull it together for most of the day at work, but at night… I’ve kind of just used up all my “try”.  I’ve started letters to J, to my friends, to my parents…. talking to them about things that I wish I could talk to them about, but then I don’t send them.  I keep wondering if I’m making a mistake and perhaps I should just go back to make everyone happy.  Perhaps I was careless and didn’t really give him an opportunity…

I’m just all over the place and I would give anything to make my brain stop!!!!!!  To feel somewhat normal.  To feel not so dead and empty and worthless inside.  Perhaps I’m being too dramatic, but this is what is happening like it or not.  I’m so f-ing done.

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By ameliashope Posted in General

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